This is the first post under the new title of the blog - "rooted." Previously, "wanderings," I have been thinking a lot lately about growth (see previous post). As an adventure seeker and romantic, I tend to wander a lot - in my heart, my mind, my decisions, my hobbies. I end up covering a lot of ground, but there is constant unrest in my soul if I'm not careful.
God is teaching me some things lately. I don't think it's bad to wander...for a time. We need experiences to learn. We need new settings to attempt new things. We need change to develop. C.S. Lewis describes this phenomenon as "finding your face." He illustrates it in his fictional story, Til We Have Faces. His idea is that we aren't who we are until we have "found our face" - until we find and know our identity. Then we can live as we were meant to live, and be the person we were meant to be.
I believe that finding face means finding a spot to grow - not a physical spot, necessarily, but a place in Christ. We are, after all, made in His image. We are His body. What part am I, then? What part are you? That is the place to find. And in that place do we begin growth. We're not growing up, however, we're growing down. Roots.
After finding our place in the body of Christ, I believe we then dig in for the long haul, and begin the slow process of penetrating the soil and reaching downward and outward. Downward, of course, into the depths of Christ. Outward, then, is reaching for the other plants or believers planted firmly in Christ alongside you. This process continues until we cannot be moved by any outside force, and until we have connected and intertwined with the believers around us.
My initial thought is of horror. Firmly planted? I can't do that...my heart will burst. I have a friend who says all the time that she goes where the wind blows. I relate completely. My heart cries freedom, and I envy the herds of wild horses that run free and passionate, and move at will. But who created me? Who made me free-spirited and passionate and on fire? The Lord, of course - the one in whom I am now firmly planted, or beginning to plant myself would be a more accurate discription. He knows my heart and soul; He created them. He made me the way I am. When I "find my face," I am not really finding anything new, I am merely realizing how He has already made me, and where my place is in His body, in His plan.
I'm beginning to see that if I will firmly plant myself in Him, and dig my roots in deep, then when He moves, I'll move with Him...I won't be left behind because my roots will hold me fast.
I'm tired of wandering, but I'm not tired of adventure. I am ready, though, to relinquish my wanderlust for the desire to grow deep in Christ. I'm ready for Him to take me where He goes. I have a feeling His adventures are better than the ones I've dreamed up.