Open my mouth to drink the life -
To sip on this cup you have brought me -
To gulp down what's inside -
To fill my gasping lungs until their feeble attempts at breath are drowned out,
Until my feeble attempts at living cease and desist.
I swallow and my soul feeds off of the richness you have brought with this water turned to wine...
To wine.
I expected less, but with each swallow it burns an unforgettable impression -
A thousand years is not enough.
A thousand years.
So celebrate we will - the taste, the sweetness, the joy.
My cup overflows and the last drop is unimaginable,
Until my eyelids lift and spot the empty cup.
A dream has surpassed my imagination, crowding out reality in favor of insanity -
For love.
A smile wisps on the corners of my mouth and I close my mind to the world in favor of my dream.
A thousand years is not enough.
inspired by Dave Matthews Band's "Two Step"
Showing posts with label dave matthews band. Show all posts
Showing posts with label dave matthews band. Show all posts
5.02.2010
12.30.2009
the end.
This year is about to end. 2009 will kick it, and 2010 will be here before we can even say goodbye.
It's been a good year, I'd say. It's had its ups and downs for sure...they all do. I think I grew up this year, though. Maybe. I'm starting to wonder if we grow up more every year. There must be a lot of room for growth then because we are never grown up if we are always growing up. I'll try not to get discouraged. I guess grown ups are no fun anyways.
I thought about doing a year in review and going through some old things I'd written, picking and choosing my favorites. I've already shared those things, though. I realized that a more accurate reflection of my year would be to share something that I wrote but never posted...because I was too scared that people wouldn't understand it or wouldn't see what I was saying, or they would think it was too abstract.
Well here goes. I wrote this at the beginning of summer '09.
"When it happens what do you say? Do you look around you for the words, or find them hiding behind you, creeping like the past? Or do you glance ahead into the darkness of uncertainty and fumble around for a sentence that makes sense? It's a haze that wasn't self-induced, and it clouds the vessels surrounding your heart as you try to beat out a rhythm that rhymes. And as the blood puddles, leaving your severed arteries, you cry, and you search the recesses of your mind for one glimmer of light to give meaning to the sound coming out of your mouth. Who do you love? Who fills your mind as your body empties out onto the ground? Breathe your last few breaths and feel the oxygen burn your lungs, and as you gasp, find the strength to say that name. But what if your speech doesn't echo back, and your wayward voice is lost in the canyons that give no return for what they took from you. What if the wind forgets the author when it carries the message? The message falls on deaf ears, and no answer comes. The darkness taunts, "Pick a new name." But what if there is none. What if that was the only one. Please, God, no. Help me find a new name."
This image came to me when I was thinking about people being on their death beds (morbid? just bear with me). You always see in the movies where someone is dying and they ask for one person. They may be in the room. They may have to be found. Sometimes they haven't spoken to this person in years. But for some reason, this one person comes to their heart as they lie there dying. Love. They love this person. Their love is so strong that no matter what grievances they share, in their desperation, they cry out for that one person to comfort them as they die.
I would say that everyone has that person, that name, that they would ask for. And of course, in the movies, that person who was called comes running to the bedside, restitution is made, kisses are shared, and the person dies in peace. What struck me, though, were the times that I know someone has called out for their love, but that love was not returned. What if you were dying and the only name their heart wanted didn't want them back? Who else could they call for? Maybe no one.
This idea scares me more than anything else, I think. I don't want to leave this feeling depressed, though, because I am not. And I haven't been. It just makes me think. It has made me trust God more and more. We may not have tomorrow. We may not have tonight. But we're never really alone, even if we think we are. He is with us more than we'll ever know. But also, it has made me cherish the people around me - the people who I don't know if I'll see again tomorrow, because we never know. It's the simple things in life we need to learn to be thankful for. The little things.
Dave Matthews says, "Take these chances, place them in a box until quieter times, lights down you up and die."
I'm gonna take these chances and cherish this life and the people I love. I am so so blessed.
It's been a good year, I'd say. It's had its ups and downs for sure...they all do. I think I grew up this year, though. Maybe. I'm starting to wonder if we grow up more every year. There must be a lot of room for growth then because we are never grown up if we are always growing up. I'll try not to get discouraged. I guess grown ups are no fun anyways.
I thought about doing a year in review and going through some old things I'd written, picking and choosing my favorites. I've already shared those things, though. I realized that a more accurate reflection of my year would be to share something that I wrote but never posted...because I was too scared that people wouldn't understand it or wouldn't see what I was saying, or they would think it was too abstract.
Well here goes. I wrote this at the beginning of summer '09.
"When it happens what do you say? Do you look around you for the words, or find them hiding behind you, creeping like the past? Or do you glance ahead into the darkness of uncertainty and fumble around for a sentence that makes sense? It's a haze that wasn't self-induced, and it clouds the vessels surrounding your heart as you try to beat out a rhythm that rhymes. And as the blood puddles, leaving your severed arteries, you cry, and you search the recesses of your mind for one glimmer of light to give meaning to the sound coming out of your mouth. Who do you love? Who fills your mind as your body empties out onto the ground? Breathe your last few breaths and feel the oxygen burn your lungs, and as you gasp, find the strength to say that name. But what if your speech doesn't echo back, and your wayward voice is lost in the canyons that give no return for what they took from you. What if the wind forgets the author when it carries the message? The message falls on deaf ears, and no answer comes. The darkness taunts, "Pick a new name." But what if there is none. What if that was the only one. Please, God, no. Help me find a new name."
This image came to me when I was thinking about people being on their death beds (morbid? just bear with me). You always see in the movies where someone is dying and they ask for one person. They may be in the room. They may have to be found. Sometimes they haven't spoken to this person in years. But for some reason, this one person comes to their heart as they lie there dying. Love. They love this person. Their love is so strong that no matter what grievances they share, in their desperation, they cry out for that one person to comfort them as they die.
I would say that everyone has that person, that name, that they would ask for. And of course, in the movies, that person who was called comes running to the bedside, restitution is made, kisses are shared, and the person dies in peace. What struck me, though, were the times that I know someone has called out for their love, but that love was not returned. What if you were dying and the only name their heart wanted didn't want them back? Who else could they call for? Maybe no one.
This idea scares me more than anything else, I think. I don't want to leave this feeling depressed, though, because I am not. And I haven't been. It just makes me think. It has made me trust God more and more. We may not have tomorrow. We may not have tonight. But we're never really alone, even if we think we are. He is with us more than we'll ever know. But also, it has made me cherish the people around me - the people who I don't know if I'll see again tomorrow, because we never know. It's the simple things in life we need to learn to be thankful for. The little things.
Dave Matthews says, "Take these chances, place them in a box until quieter times, lights down you up and die."
I'm gonna take these chances and cherish this life and the people I love. I am so so blessed.
12.09.2009
recently i've been all of content and dreaming.
For the foolishness of God is wiser than men, and the weakness of God is stronger than men.
Who am I to ever question God? The things that I see happening that I think are foolish or crazy, if they are from the Lord, they contain more wisdom than my mind can grasp.
For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were considered wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth.
This semester I've been learning to trust that God knows what He's doing. I'm waiting to hear back from P.A. school, and it's nerve-wracking at best. The world is going to tell me if I'm good enough to get into their schools. Based on my worldly achievements (or lack of), I'm going to receive or be rejected admission into grad schools. I have often felt lacking, but have had to remember that God knows what's good for me. Also, in the real world where most of my friends have boyfriends, fiances, husbands, and even babies, I've had to rest in the fact that He knows exactly what I need. I'm not lacking because I'm single, I'm just right here right now. The world may say there's something wrong with me if I'm not "in a relationship," but I have to believe that God has a better plan for me, and perfect timing. Worldly standards mean nothing.
But God has chosen what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are..
I'm so glad that I am not measured by things of the world. I'm glad that my life can appear foolish and weak to men, but be exactly what God wants for me.
..so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. And because of him you are in Jesus Christ, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification, and redemption, so that, as it is written, "Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord."
It's funny how forgetting myself and boasting in the Lord brings such relief from pressure and anxiety. Nothing I do that is measured by the world matters. All I do is for Him and His sake, and all that He provides is perfect and in perfect timing. His plan for me, however foolish it might seem, is absolutely perfect. Dave Matthews has a song called Recently, and the lyrics say "Recently I've been, all of content and dreaming I have been...people stare and we just ignore everything, people stare and we just ignore them, and they go away, go away."
I like the foolishness of God, because it lets me rest easy. It lets me enjoy the life He's given me, and wait expectantly for the joys and blessings He has for me.
Recently I've been all of content and dreaming...and I'm looking forward to much more :).
Who am I to ever question God? The things that I see happening that I think are foolish or crazy, if they are from the Lord, they contain more wisdom than my mind can grasp.
For consider your calling, brothers: not many of you were considered wise according to worldly standards, not many were powerful, not many were of noble birth.
This semester I've been learning to trust that God knows what He's doing. I'm waiting to hear back from P.A. school, and it's nerve-wracking at best. The world is going to tell me if I'm good enough to get into their schools. Based on my worldly achievements (or lack of), I'm going to receive or be rejected admission into grad schools. I have often felt lacking, but have had to remember that God knows what's good for me. Also, in the real world where most of my friends have boyfriends, fiances, husbands, and even babies, I've had to rest in the fact that He knows exactly what I need. I'm not lacking because I'm single, I'm just right here right now. The world may say there's something wrong with me if I'm not "in a relationship," but I have to believe that God has a better plan for me, and perfect timing. Worldly standards mean nothing.
But God has chosen what is foolish in the world to shame the wise; God chose what is weak in the world to shame the strong; God chose what is low and despised in the world, even things that are not, to bring to nothing things that are..
I'm so glad that I am not measured by things of the world. I'm glad that my life can appear foolish and weak to men, but be exactly what God wants for me.
..so that no human being might boast in the presence of God. And because of him you are in Jesus Christ, who became to us wisdom from God, righteousness and sanctification, and redemption, so that, as it is written, "Let the one who boasts, boast in the Lord."
It's funny how forgetting myself and boasting in the Lord brings such relief from pressure and anxiety. Nothing I do that is measured by the world matters. All I do is for Him and His sake, and all that He provides is perfect and in perfect timing. His plan for me, however foolish it might seem, is absolutely perfect. Dave Matthews has a song called Recently, and the lyrics say "Recently I've been, all of content and dreaming I have been...people stare and we just ignore everything, people stare and we just ignore them, and they go away, go away."
I like the foolishness of God, because it lets me rest easy. It lets me enjoy the life He's given me, and wait expectantly for the joys and blessings He has for me.
Recently I've been all of content and dreaming...and I'm looking forward to much more :).
10.15.2009
truth in disguise: my favorite song.
I love finding truth in unlikely places. It reminds me of how big God truly is, and how He was here before me and will be here after me. There's a missions poster in my office that reads "Take Jesus to China." I disagree. Jesus is already in China, we should take the knowledge of Him and deeper understanding to China. Jesus is everywhere and in everything, even in places and situations that He seems hidden or even absent.
Unfortunately, this world is full of evil as well. "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." (1 Peter 5:8) But the presence of evil and deception does not necessarily mean the absence of Truth. Jesus permeates all aspects of life - the religious and the secular. We see this with Joseph in Genesis 50:20 when his brothers sold him into slavery: "As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result..."
All this being said, I'm going to start recording the curious and sometimes strange places from which I glean Truth. It will be my "truth in disguise" collection or series or whatever you would like to call it. The purpose of my findings are not to display theologically sound arguments, because most of the artifacts I find will probably be heretical. The purpose is to see God's Truth everywhere, and to see Jesus working in all things, because He does.
I thought it fitting to begin with my favorite song: Bartender by Dave Matthews Band. I love Dave Matthews. I don't just like him and his music, I love them. (Here's why if you're wondering, posted as a comment to my friend Sarah's wonderful blog.) I love his music for many reasons, and this song is just one of them. I've included the lyrics below and the title is a link to the actual song if you're interested in listening; I highly recommend it.
I love this song because it is raw. It's a gritty picture of a man desperate for love in his life, desiring fondness from his brother, respect from his sister, guidance and discipline from his mother, and answers from his father. It's even more beautiful because the music sings this longing in the deep bass and soulful chords. He talks about how he longs for the wine that set Jesus free. I see this "wine" as a metaphor for life that "set Jesus free after three days in the ground." C.H. Spurgeon describes wine in Scripture as "the symbol of the richest earthly joy." This song speaks of a longing for freedom and rich joy in the best way Dave knows how to talk about it - wine, a rich, earthly joy. And yet it is clear that in the song, he realizes what many do not, that if we seek the wrong things to find freedom, we will surely die. He talks about longing the same wine that "strung Judas from the tree." He begins the song asking the bartender to fill his glass, and progresses by telling the bartender to look and see the "wine that's drinking me." That thing which originally was sought to bring life has turned into something that is controlling and confining him, ultimately to the point of death.
What a beautiful picture of a lost soul, blindly struggling and reaching for something he cannot see and does not know and yet is placing all of his hope in for a chance at freedom and life. I love this picture, because even believers can relate to the longing we have in our souls to be right with Jesus. Paul says in Romans 7:15, "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." The difference for us, however, is that we know the solution. We know that the "wine" that brings freedom is Jesus Christ. "Your love is better than wine." (Song of Solomon 1:2) His love is better than _______ (insert anything).
I hope that if you've never heard this song, you'll give it a shot. If you have heard it, I hope that when you listen to it now, you'll see Jesus in it. That's what He wants us to do, after all, see Him in everything.
Bartender
If I go
Before I'm old
Oh, brother of mine
Please don't forget me if I go
Bartender, please
Fill my glass for me
With the wine you gave Jesus that set him free
After three days in the ground
Oh, and if I die
Before my time
Oh, sweet sister of mine
Please don't regret me if I die
Bartender, please
Fill my glass for me
With the wine you gave Jesus that set him free
After three days in the ground
Bartender, please
Fill my glass for me
With the wine you gave Jesus that set him free
After three days in the ground
I'm on bended knees, I pray
Bartender, please
When I was young, I didn't think about it
Now I can't get it out of my mind
I'm on bended knees
Father, please
Oh, and if all this gold
Should steal my soul away
Oh, sweet mother of mine
Please redirect me if this gold
Bartender, you see
The wine that's drinking me
came from the vine that strung Judas from the Devil's tree
His roots deep, deep in the ground
Bartender, you see
The wine that's drinking me
came from the vine that strung Judas from the Devil's tree
his roots deep, deep in the ground,in the ground
I'm on bended knees
Oh, Bartender, please
I'm on bended knees
Father, please
When I was young, I never dreamed about it
Now I just want to run and die
I'm on bended knees
Oh, Bartender, please
Bartender, please
Unfortunately, this world is full of evil as well. "Be self-controlled and alert. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." (1 Peter 5:8) But the presence of evil and deception does not necessarily mean the absence of Truth. Jesus permeates all aspects of life - the religious and the secular. We see this with Joseph in Genesis 50:20 when his brothers sold him into slavery: "As for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good in order to bring about this present result..."
All this being said, I'm going to start recording the curious and sometimes strange places from which I glean Truth. It will be my "truth in disguise" collection or series or whatever you would like to call it. The purpose of my findings are not to display theologically sound arguments, because most of the artifacts I find will probably be heretical. The purpose is to see God's Truth everywhere, and to see Jesus working in all things, because He does.
I thought it fitting to begin with my favorite song: Bartender by Dave Matthews Band. I love Dave Matthews. I don't just like him and his music, I love them. (Here's why if you're wondering, posted as a comment to my friend Sarah's wonderful blog.) I love his music for many reasons, and this song is just one of them. I've included the lyrics below and the title is a link to the actual song if you're interested in listening; I highly recommend it.
I love this song because it is raw. It's a gritty picture of a man desperate for love in his life, desiring fondness from his brother, respect from his sister, guidance and discipline from his mother, and answers from his father. It's even more beautiful because the music sings this longing in the deep bass and soulful chords. He talks about how he longs for the wine that set Jesus free. I see this "wine" as a metaphor for life that "set Jesus free after three days in the ground." C.H. Spurgeon describes wine in Scripture as "the symbol of the richest earthly joy." This song speaks of a longing for freedom and rich joy in the best way Dave knows how to talk about it - wine, a rich, earthly joy. And yet it is clear that in the song, he realizes what many do not, that if we seek the wrong things to find freedom, we will surely die. He talks about longing the same wine that "strung Judas from the tree." He begins the song asking the bartender to fill his glass, and progresses by telling the bartender to look and see the "wine that's drinking me." That thing which originally was sought to bring life has turned into something that is controlling and confining him, ultimately to the point of death.
What a beautiful picture of a lost soul, blindly struggling and reaching for something he cannot see and does not know and yet is placing all of his hope in for a chance at freedom and life. I love this picture, because even believers can relate to the longing we have in our souls to be right with Jesus. Paul says in Romans 7:15, "I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do." The difference for us, however, is that we know the solution. We know that the "wine" that brings freedom is Jesus Christ. "Your love is better than wine." (Song of Solomon 1:2) His love is better than _______ (insert anything).
I hope that if you've never heard this song, you'll give it a shot. If you have heard it, I hope that when you listen to it now, you'll see Jesus in it. That's what He wants us to do, after all, see Him in everything.
Bartender
If I go
Before I'm old
Oh, brother of mine
Please don't forget me if I go
Bartender, please
Fill my glass for me
With the wine you gave Jesus that set him free
After three days in the ground
Oh, and if I die
Before my time
Oh, sweet sister of mine
Please don't regret me if I die
Bartender, please
Fill my glass for me
With the wine you gave Jesus that set him free
After three days in the ground
Bartender, please
Fill my glass for me
With the wine you gave Jesus that set him free
After three days in the ground
I'm on bended knees, I pray
Bartender, please
When I was young, I didn't think about it
Now I can't get it out of my mind
I'm on bended knees
Father, please
Oh, and if all this gold
Should steal my soul away
Oh, sweet mother of mine
Please redirect me if this gold
Bartender, you see
The wine that's drinking me
came from the vine that strung Judas from the Devil's tree
His roots deep, deep in the ground
Bartender, you see
The wine that's drinking me
came from the vine that strung Judas from the Devil's tree
his roots deep, deep in the ground,in the ground
I'm on bended knees
Oh, Bartender, please
I'm on bended knees
Father, please
When I was young, I never dreamed about it
Now I just want to run and die
I'm on bended knees
Oh, Bartender, please
Bartender, please
4.02.2009
making room.
Well it's been a month since I've written. I don't usually go this long intentionally, but I was challenged by a friend who told me that I should try putting to practice some of the things I write about. So I did. I took a step back from philosophizing and seeking out new Truths, and looked at the Truth I had already been gathering and piling up in little neat piles all around me.
It was revealing. Some Truth is hard to swallow. It's a lot easier to discover something, set it aside, and go start hunting new treasure, especially if what you've found is not pretty. I think it's beneficial to dust off what we find, study it a little closer, and see what value it has, not just in itself, but in how it reflects God.
This isn't my avenue to list out the things that I've done differently in this month of working with the wisdom and Truth that I already have. What I'm doing isn't as important as that I'm doing them. I think that goes for all of us. As long as what we do lines up with Truth, the important thing is that we're doing it. It's easy to hear the Word and God's Truth...a lot harder to examine it and do what it says.
James 2...."22Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does."
Dave Matthews has a song called the Raven, and in it he says, "You never know it all, the ground beneath is nothing more than your point of view." It's true. If you don't move around, you don't see new things in new ways. And you don't change. And you don't move forward. And if you aren't moving forward, you're stuck in the places you've been...and frankly, I don't want to stay in those places.
So thank you, friend, for telling me to do what I say. And thank you Jesus for always doing what you say. I uncovered a lot of wisdom that had been collecting dust this past month. I sorted through a few boxes, and threw some away...for good.
And guess what. I made some room.
It was revealing. Some Truth is hard to swallow. It's a lot easier to discover something, set it aside, and go start hunting new treasure, especially if what you've found is not pretty. I think it's beneficial to dust off what we find, study it a little closer, and see what value it has, not just in itself, but in how it reflects God.
This isn't my avenue to list out the things that I've done differently in this month of working with the wisdom and Truth that I already have. What I'm doing isn't as important as that I'm doing them. I think that goes for all of us. As long as what we do lines up with Truth, the important thing is that we're doing it. It's easy to hear the Word and God's Truth...a lot harder to examine it and do what it says.
James 2...."22Do not merely listen to the word, and so deceive yourselves. Do what it says. 23Anyone who listens to the word but does not do what it says is like a man who looks at his face in a mirror 24and, after looking at himself, goes away and immediately forgets what he looks like. 25But the man who looks intently into the perfect law that gives freedom, and continues to do this, not forgetting what he has heard, but doing it—he will be blessed in what he does."
Dave Matthews has a song called the Raven, and in it he says, "You never know it all, the ground beneath is nothing more than your point of view." It's true. If you don't move around, you don't see new things in new ways. And you don't change. And you don't move forward. And if you aren't moving forward, you're stuck in the places you've been...and frankly, I don't want to stay in those places.
So thank you, friend, for telling me to do what I say. And thank you Jesus for always doing what you say. I uncovered a lot of wisdom that had been collecting dust this past month. I sorted through a few boxes, and threw some away...for good.
And guess what. I made some room.
7.28.2008
Mr. Manning
God will bring good out of evil - even a greater good than if there had been no evil - and the trial will have been an immense good for us. (BM)
The prophet Jeremiah is a striking example of the biblical paradox that surrender means victory, that in losing our life we find it. (BM)
These two quotes come from Brennan Manning's book, The Relentless Tenderness of Jesus. Mmm....just the title causes the corners of my mouth to uncontrollably turn up in a smile. These are hard truths. I'm living and learning them.
I'm listening to the song Two Step, by Dave Matthews right now. The lyrics contrast with these quotes, and yet they seem to coincide. I've been thinking about these song lyrics now for a while.....waiting for some inspiring thought to string together in my mind and form a revelation of some sort that will end up here for you to see. Still waiting....
Two Step
Say, my love, I came to you
With best intentions
You laid down and gave to me just what
Im seeking
Love, you drive me to distraction
Hey my love do you believe that we
Might last a thousand years
Or more if not for this?
Our flesh and blood it ties
You and me right up
Tie me down
Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
Were climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue,
These things we cannot change
Hey, my love, you came to me like
Wine comes to this mouth
Grown tired of water all the time
You quench my heart and you
Quench my mind
Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
Were climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue,
The things we cannot
...Things we cannot change
The prophet Jeremiah is a striking example of the biblical paradox that surrender means victory, that in losing our life we find it. (BM)
These two quotes come from Brennan Manning's book, The Relentless Tenderness of Jesus. Mmm....just the title causes the corners of my mouth to uncontrollably turn up in a smile. These are hard truths. I'm living and learning them.
I'm listening to the song Two Step, by Dave Matthews right now. The lyrics contrast with these quotes, and yet they seem to coincide. I've been thinking about these song lyrics now for a while.....waiting for some inspiring thought to string together in my mind and form a revelation of some sort that will end up here for you to see. Still waiting....
Two Step
Say, my love, I came to you
With best intentions
You laid down and gave to me just what
Im seeking
Love, you drive me to distraction
Hey my love do you believe that we
Might last a thousand years
Or more if not for this?
Our flesh and blood it ties
You and me right up
Tie me down
Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
Were climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue,
These things we cannot change
Hey, my love, you came to me like
Wine comes to this mouth
Grown tired of water all the time
You quench my heart and you
Quench my mind
Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
Were climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue,
The things we cannot
...Things we cannot change
7.14.2008
Dreams.
A quote from one of my favorite bands says this:
"Don't lose the dreams inside your head, they'll only be there til you're dead, dream..."
(Dave Matthews Band)
I've been thinking a lot about dreams lately - the ones I have for my life, the ones other people have for me, and the ones I know God has planned. I'm learning that as I grow up and mature, all of these dreams begin to resonate with one another, and I begin to find direction. It doesn't matter that I don't know where I'm going to end up, at least I have some sort of way to turn and follow (Isaiah 30:21 says, "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, 'This is the Way; walk in it.'").
I firmly believe in purpose. Humans have all sorts of purposes in their lives. To me, purpose seems to compliment identity. My purpose as a daughter is to honor my parents. My purpose as a sister is to love my brother. My purpose as a roommate is to live in community and be a caretaker of my house. My purpose as a student is to study and learn to the best of my ability to obtain a degree. My purpose as an Aggie is to represent A&M and carry on the tradition. And the list could go on and on.
My purpose as a Christian is to know God and make Him known. Funny how our most important purpose seems the most ambiguous and hard to define. I'm learning that the point of our seemingly mysterious purpose is to focus on the purpose-Giver rather than the purpose itself. However, that purpose is important as well, because it is the Way we walk (see Isaiah 30:21 again. God whispers direction, but we walk in it.).
I'm watching people all around me drop their dreams (or purpose) for opportunities or blessings along the way. At first this seems legitimate; after all, isn't a good thing, a good thing? But what about your dreams? What about the things you hold in your heart, and maybe don't let anyone else see? The things that your body aches to see come to pass?
I'm learning that my age-old method of seeing one door close and waiting for a window to open may not be the right way. Dreams tend to unfold rather than open and close, so you only see part of it for a while. Sometimes I think it is good to close an open door in front of you to keep waiting for that other door that your heart tells you will open eventually.
Sometimes it is good to say no to what is in front of you, so that you can say yes to something later. Something better, maybe.
God is teaching me to let go of what's around me, search my heart for the dreams He has given me, and to cling to His promise of fulfilling His purpose for me. There are certain dreams I have that I know could have only come from Him, and He's teaching me to treasure them in my heart because they're from Him. And if I keep looking at Him, He'll either bring them to pass, or give me new dreams.
I'm just looking at Jesus, holding onto my dreams, and praying that He makes them His.
"Don't lose the dreams inside your head, they'll only be there til you're dead, dream..."
(Dave Matthews Band)
I've been thinking a lot about dreams lately - the ones I have for my life, the ones other people have for me, and the ones I know God has planned. I'm learning that as I grow up and mature, all of these dreams begin to resonate with one another, and I begin to find direction. It doesn't matter that I don't know where I'm going to end up, at least I have some sort of way to turn and follow (Isaiah 30:21 says, "Whether you turn to the right or to the left, your ears will hear a voice behind you, saying, 'This is the Way; walk in it.'").
I firmly believe in purpose. Humans have all sorts of purposes in their lives. To me, purpose seems to compliment identity. My purpose as a daughter is to honor my parents. My purpose as a sister is to love my brother. My purpose as a roommate is to live in community and be a caretaker of my house. My purpose as a student is to study and learn to the best of my ability to obtain a degree. My purpose as an Aggie is to represent A&M and carry on the tradition. And the list could go on and on.
My purpose as a Christian is to know God and make Him known. Funny how our most important purpose seems the most ambiguous and hard to define. I'm learning that the point of our seemingly mysterious purpose is to focus on the purpose-Giver rather than the purpose itself. However, that purpose is important as well, because it is the Way we walk (see Isaiah 30:21 again. God whispers direction, but we walk in it.).
I'm watching people all around me drop their dreams (or purpose) for opportunities or blessings along the way. At first this seems legitimate; after all, isn't a good thing, a good thing? But what about your dreams? What about the things you hold in your heart, and maybe don't let anyone else see? The things that your body aches to see come to pass?
I'm learning that my age-old method of seeing one door close and waiting for a window to open may not be the right way. Dreams tend to unfold rather than open and close, so you only see part of it for a while. Sometimes I think it is good to close an open door in front of you to keep waiting for that other door that your heart tells you will open eventually.
Sometimes it is good to say no to what is in front of you, so that you can say yes to something later. Something better, maybe.
God is teaching me to let go of what's around me, search my heart for the dreams He has given me, and to cling to His promise of fulfilling His purpose for me. There are certain dreams I have that I know could have only come from Him, and He's teaching me to treasure them in my heart because they're from Him. And if I keep looking at Him, He'll either bring them to pass, or give me new dreams.
I'm just looking at Jesus, holding onto my dreams, and praying that He makes them His.
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